"see this tattoo over my heart, it represents the Raiders wherever they are and wherever they play, we don't want your fans, five of our fans cheer louder than all of your 'fans' put together. 'five Superbowls, five Superbowls' good, that's five trophies I can stick up your ass along with your wine glasses, broken nails, and your skirts."

"Saturday's game was a dream come true for Raiders fans, considered among the most loyal in the sport. Even after the team left Oakland in 1982 to play in Los Angeles, the fans never gave up hope the team would return. Many refused to wear any Raiders memorabilia emblazoned with the blasphemous words 'Los Angeles.' Paul Dulle, a 33-year-old Coca-Cola merchandiser, said the 32 on his jersey was not for former Raiders great Marcus Allen, who wore that number in Los Angeles, but for legendary defensive back Jack Tatum, who wore the number in Oakland." (This is my favorite.)

"Come to the tailgate parties, there's probably plenty of single guys on the list, so you might be able to 'marry' into a PSL!!!!! D'oh!"

"Have her tell Patrick that I am going to go find him and kick his ass!!!"

"Hell yeah, I was born in silver and black blood, docter slapped me and I stabbed him with one of the swords in my head, then put my patch on and left the hospital."

"'I feel so ejubilated,' Camarena said."

"The leader of the pro-football's bad boys appeared deep in thought as he entered the Coliseum at 11:15 a.m. Al Davis stopped by a small crowd of children and adult fans but said little to them. He began to walk away, but then slowly turned and raised his right fist in the air."

"I think one of the worst things I ever heard Dierdork say was after Napoleon McCallum destroyed his knee during last year MNF opener VS the Whiners, 'All we can say is that we sure hope it isn't as bad as it looks.' HIS KNEE EXPLODED YOU IDIOT!!!"

"Here at the Rocket Ranch we are conducting an intensive study on the differences between US and Canadian beer. We have yet to reach a conclusion as a great deal more testing of both products needs to be done."

"Hoskins has numerous brain farts, but, Eddie is so poor at pass coverage, he could lose an elephant in a racketball court. He gets beat like a drum. He's so slow, snails are giving him the finger. He's out of position so often, Biekert has to wear a map of the U.S. on the back of his helmet, just so Eddie can stay in the correct state."

"After scoring their lone TD he decided to show all of us sitting in that end-zone how BAD he was by strutting and pointing. We pointed back, but not with the same finger ;). We'll remember this, Jefferson."

"A grade of B sounds OK. I don't recall Anderson doing anything particularly horrible, but he probably just didn't get caught doing it this time. Maybe a B-."

"If Deion intercepts a ball, and runs it back for a TD, I don't care if he does the Hokey-Pokey or stands on his head. If Trapp scores a TD, he can dance and sing, or recite the Gettysburg Address, for all I care."

"I can remember the days when players would give anything to play for the Raiders. (Another reason why I defend Williams even though I like Jones better... Williams wants to be a Raider!)"

"I mentioned to my wife that two of the local Raider gang are headed to Oakland for the game, when she floored me with the words 'why don't we go?'. Uh OK. Thirty seconds later transportation and tix were arranged."

"The carnival atmosphere was in full swing as traveling street rappers, fans in Darth Vader and Captain Kidd costumes, and S & B Harleys flying giant Raider flags paraded up and down the aisles. I even saw one guy with his dog in full Raider gear and sporting an eyepatch. It was great."

"During the first quarter with our guys down 17-0, we were subjected to the howls of laughter from a group of Philly fans two rows back. It was disgusting, but payback was ,Oh, so sweet. As they tried to sneak out midway thru the fourth quarter, 3000 fans in our section were standing up, pointing at them, and chanting.... LOSER... LOSER... LOSER!!"

"By the way, after watching a good portion of the Donkey game, the only difference between the Donkey Defense and a bag of horse manure, is the bag!"

"after the game ray rhodes described his team as being completely physically dominated at all positions."

"Well, guess you can all visit me in jail then.....my modem called the number 247 times while I slept last night.......for about a minute each time."

"As far as Raider loyalty goes -It's like my son's No Fear racing shirt says, 'Those who know, cannot explain. Those who don't, cannot understand.' "

"My wife usually goes shopping during games because I make her nervous. My kids either watch the game with me or disappear, but they know better than to interrupt."

"Except for his one run, he averaged less than Fenner rushing (but still not as bad as Harv, who will need approx. 2000 carries to reach the 1000 yard mark at this rate)."

"Things were completely out of hand already, and my brother and I could do nothing but laugh when the ref dropped his hanky after the kickoff was downed in the endzone for a touchback and announced 'Unsportsmanlike conduct on the kicking team. Surrounding and intimidating the receiver.' "

"As the final seconds ticked off the clock we all shouted in unison 'RAIDERS, RAIDERS, RAIDERS...' in a slow annoying chant that cut deep into the souls of the beaten Redskin faithful."

"Near-death experience at RFK: A friend and I were waving a huge Raider blanket/banner at the front of the 200 level/20 yard line section. Everyone was getting irate, throwing ice, and threatening us. Actually it was great. The fans actually seemed to respect us Raider fanatics when we weren't trying to convert their children to the dark side!!!!"

"don't lump me into that donkey dung-box."

"Now it's time for Da Raydahs to line up, strap down and kick Marty and Squaw's ass sideways. And to make the prideless traitors regret they day they left the S&B."

"The Oakland crowd showed a lot of class (and paitence). There was this Eagle fan walking up the stairs. I was wondering way he wasn't getting harrased by the crowd like the rest of the misguided souls. I was waiting for him to get close to make sure he would hear me scream 'EAGLES SUCK!' I noticed he was holding his little girls hand as he walked through the crowd. I thought that was awesome."

"They were down 17-0. At first it didn't make sense, until I realized that I was sitting back too far from the tv set. After moving my chair up close and personal, things started going right. It scared me to think I could have cost us two games in a row, but the chair position was perfect, and things started clicking."

"Seeing Harvey play this well makes me feel OK about seeing Nap only every once in a while -- sort of like a steady diet of something great, and then ... Oo! That was good too!"

Of course how could I forget this legendary post, when all of us where hanging on our seats to find out how the invasion went:

"We spent Saturday afternoon at Point Reyes beach north of S.F., then headed over to Eddie's house for a BBQ during the S.F./Denver game. This was put on by one of Ed's daughters or step-daughters, and I got the impression it's something of a tradition when the 49ers play (and dad's away). Needless to say, I didn't run into Eddie or Carmen. It was hot, and I was already a bit loopy from the beer at the beach. There were about 30-40 people there, all in their 20's and 30's, and most wearing more in clothes than I make in a month. I hated most of them instantly. The bash itself wasn't as bad as I expected, but that could have something to do with the good free food, and getting drunk on Ed's booze. I was also on a mission from God and Allah...

"'Why no maam, that's not a banana in my pocket, it's an Oakland Raiders sticker. Why do you ask?'

"There were about twenty cars parked in the driveway, so that quickly eliminated the back bumper strategy. The whole house struck me as very bright white, and I had a hard time scoping out a place where a black sticker wouldn't stand out too much. On my second trip to the head, I 'accidently' got lost and scouted around the place. I ended up in a small study/den that had a few 49er momentos strung about; framed pictures of 'The Catch', and the like. I was tempted to plaster the sticker right across Joe Montana's face, but figured a maid would remove it before anyone else would see it. If you're ever in Eddie DeBartolo's study and want to make a phone call from his 49er helmet phone, you may find a Silver and Black - 1995 Oakland Raiders Return bumper sticker plastered under the handset. I then dialed 1-800-HOT-BABE, and asked for Carmen.

"When I returned to the party, I couldn't stop grinning, and my S.O. pretty much knew something was up. Fortunately, she's not a football fan, and didn't grow up in the Bay Area, so I don't think she connected 49ers hatred and me being a Raider fan.

"One thing I wish I had was a camera. A picture of me wiping my butt with one of Ed's red and gold pillows would have been priceless. Next time..."